Some friends of mine dont fit in my general frame of reference when I have a particular query/concern.This is simply because they dont even fit in the 'common man' criteria for that concern.
but at the same time these guys when brought into picture.. bring in amazing 'out of orbit' thoughts and perspectives which in most occasions solve my problems like no other. I njoi associating with these guys because they ask you the most uncommon questions and bring in room for fresh perspectives about life.
Maxwell shares about having a gr8 inner circle of influence. I believe itz cool to plug in with the Uncommons for innovation and re-definition of scope.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
FeedForward with Mirroring
At college while pursuing my degree in psychology, I had a funny habit.
At the outset...Folks... this blog is about learning... what better way to learn than from the blunders we all make. So here is mine...=)
Yea... So I had this habit. I used to drum a rhythm with my fingers on the table while listening to lectures. I had some beat playing in my head and I would try to imitate it. Well, thatz what I thought I was doing. Over time, this became an unconscious competence =) so much so that I never knew when, where or what I was doing with my fingers on the table.
Well... once I received good feedback =) from a priest who was talking and felt I was not listening to him. I ended up telling him that I always had this habit and it didnt have anything to do with me listening. The incident was embarrassing but it didnt change anything for me.
Until one day I was at restaurant with a friend for lunch and we were waiting to be served when my drumming habit reappeared on the table. Again I didnt know I was doing it till my friend started drumming on the other side of the table. Reality struck no better than this!
Image courtesy of Liza Gross/Public Library of Science
Mirroring helped me that day... I learnt my lesson pretty well.
I also now believe that 'some' lessons are best taught this way than giving people verbal feedback and making them feel super upset. Also, rarely does sumthing "constructive" come out of all our feedback exercise.
Lesson#1 : Feedforward with Mirroring. No words needed. People learn faster. Especially because they teach themselves =)
At the outset...Folks... this blog is about learning... what better way to learn than from the blunders we all make. So here is mine...=)
Yea... So I had this habit. I used to drum a rhythm with my fingers on the table while listening to lectures. I had some beat playing in my head and I would try to imitate it. Well, thatz what I thought I was doing. Over time, this became an unconscious competence =) so much so that I never knew when, where or what I was doing with my fingers on the table.
Well... once I received good feedback =) from a priest who was talking and felt I was not listening to him. I ended up telling him that I always had this habit and it didnt have anything to do with me listening. The incident was embarrassing but it didnt change anything for me.
Until one day I was at restaurant with a friend for lunch and we were waiting to be served when my drumming habit reappeared on the table. Again I didnt know I was doing it till my friend started drumming on the other side of the table. Reality struck no better than this!
Mirroring helped me that day... I learnt my lesson pretty well.
I also now believe that 'some' lessons are best taught this way than giving people verbal feedback and making them feel super upset. Also, rarely does sumthing "constructive" come out of all our feedback exercise.
Lesson#1 : Feedforward with Mirroring. No words needed. People learn faster. Especially because they teach themselves =)
Friday, April 15, 2011
Go-Home Strategies
Few days back, I was pondering about how to improvise learning strategies for a particular client. And this thought pops up! The need for Go-to-Home strategies.
So what is this whole new wave of thought?
Well, today I see children and their working parents are mostly out-of-home. Everybody is out-of-home for work, leisure, school, groceries, movies or for some reason or the other. I think the Ugly Truth for this is probably there is nothing engaging at home... and all the presumed engagement and fun happens out-of-home. The four walls of concrete end up being just the place where we wake up and go to sleep.
(I am jus curious... How much of well engaged time do we spend at home?)
My premise is... How cool would it be if kids, parents, husbands and wives felt great about coming home and doing stuff together? What if there is a platform at home where you can show-off, try something out, learn something new, and most importantly have 'face-time'.
(Face-time is a new word I learnt from Hans Finzel. It refers to 'real-time face to face conversations'. Thanks to TV, mobiles, PS3, facebook, and the so-called 'Work' we are always busy doing... that all of us need to start looking at people's faces a little more than facebook!)
My point... I guess we learning consultants need to get some ideas for home-engagement. Today, I was thinking in lines of getting families to work together with kids on specific learning behaviors which are mutually beneficial (ie: Parents get to learn from their kids and vice-versa)
Guys... Corporates strive to make their offices 'Great Place to Work' ... how about we make our homes 'Great Place to Live/Learn/Love/... may be even 'Work' like someone I know =)
So what is this whole new wave of thought?
Well, today I see children and their working parents are mostly out-of-home. Everybody is out-of-home for work, leisure, school, groceries, movies or for some reason or the other. I think the Ugly Truth for this is probably there is nothing engaging at home... and all the presumed engagement and fun happens out-of-home. The four walls of concrete end up being just the place where we wake up and go to sleep.
(I am jus curious... How much of well engaged time do we spend at home?)
My premise is... How cool would it be if kids, parents, husbands and wives felt great about coming home and doing stuff together? What if there is a platform at home where you can show-off, try something out, learn something new, and most importantly have 'face-time'.
(Face-time is a new word I learnt from Hans Finzel. It refers to 'real-time face to face conversations'. Thanks to TV, mobiles, PS3, facebook, and the so-called 'Work' we are always busy doing... that all of us need to start looking at people's faces a little more than facebook!)
My point... I guess we learning consultants need to get some ideas for home-engagement. Today, I was thinking in lines of getting families to work together with kids on specific learning behaviors which are mutually beneficial (ie: Parents get to learn from their kids and vice-versa)
Guys... Corporates strive to make their offices 'Great Place to Work' ... how about we make our homes 'Great Place to Live/Learn/Love/... may be even 'Work' like someone I know =)
Friday, April 8, 2011
Carrots, Eggs and a cup of Coffee...
A young woman was lamenting about her life to her mom and about how things had turned hard for her.
Her mom listening to her story, took her to the kitchen and put three pots of water to boil. In the first she placed some carrots, in the other some eggs and in the third she placed some coffee beans. She let the pots boil and said nothing at all. After about 20 minutes, she turned the stove off and asked her daughter, 'Tell me, What do you see?'
"Carrots, eggs and coffee", the daughter replied.
Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noticed they were soft. The mother then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted the rich and refreshing flavor.
Her mother went on to explain that each of the objects had faced the same adversity : boiling water. But each had reacted to it differently.
The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However after being subject to the boiling water, it softened and became week.
The egg had been fragile but after sitting through the boiling water, its insides became hardened.
But the ground coffee beans were different. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. =)
(Dunno the author of this story. I read this on a magazine called Faces, December 2007)
In hindsight, this story brings in fresh perspectives on dealing with conflicts at the workplace.
a. How would you and I react in a crisis??
b. What about the coffee beans allows it to change the water?? (hmmn.... interesting!)
Her mom listening to her story, took her to the kitchen and put three pots of water to boil. In the first she placed some carrots, in the other some eggs and in the third she placed some coffee beans. She let the pots boil and said nothing at all. After about 20 minutes, she turned the stove off and asked her daughter, 'Tell me, What do you see?'
"Carrots, eggs and coffee", the daughter replied.
Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noticed they were soft. The mother then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted the rich and refreshing flavor.
Her mother went on to explain that each of the objects had faced the same adversity : boiling water. But each had reacted to it differently.
The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However after being subject to the boiling water, it softened and became week.
The egg had been fragile but after sitting through the boiling water, its insides became hardened.
But the ground coffee beans were different. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. =)
(Dunno the author of this story. I read this on a magazine called Faces, December 2007)
In hindsight, this story brings in fresh perspectives on dealing with conflicts at the workplace.
a. How would you and I react in a crisis??
b. What about the coffee beans allows it to change the water?? (hmmn.... interesting!)
Friday, April 1, 2011
the whispers of the Heart
there are many unspoken words which resound inside my heart at certain moments of silence...
I remember, time n again, many instances where these silent, non-existent voices come to life because Father God just happened to be listening. And these appear to me to be simple surprises from above =)
One remarkable incident I will never forget is what happened while I was at Boarding School in Kottayam ten years ago. We were about 110 boarders who studied at the Mar Thoma Seminary Higher Secondary School, Kottayam. My parents and family were mostly in Muscat during that time and I had few (very few) visitors.
So I was one among the 7 NRI guys who rarely had visitors. Visitors meant a lot to us boarders coz we never get an opportunity to go out of the school premises at all! So Visitors meant 'Goodies are here' or in hostel slang we'd say - "Supply" is here! =)
There was this one Sunday, I was sitting alone and thinking " Man, I wish somebody came to visit me" coz the '12 other guys' in my room had somebody visiting them and getting them "supply". Well, Sunday just went by and the thought left my mind.
Next day morning, during the first hour in class, the peon interrupts our class and says - "The Principal is calling for Sam". Phew... I was like "What did I do" ???? (lol!)
(During that time - therez was some police case about some guys coming and burning the superb curtain at our auditorium. So being a hostelite, I thought it should be some questioning session)
Well, I am escorted to the Principal's office... and guess whoz in the Principal's office.
(keeep guessing.... =) ......)
Well.... Here is Dharmistan uncle from Trivandrum sitting with the Principal. And she says that he wanted to see me. So, we walk out. Uncle has a smile on his face as always and .... he is also having a packet in his hands! And there was among other things a Marble Cake! =)
I was jus so taken back... coz this was his first visit and I never expected somebody to come from Trivandrum (130kms away) of all places ... and I just asked him 'how come your visiting??'...
He said something like 'I jus felt seeing you.'
Man... I was such a Haaaapppy Kid!!
I was like.. 'Oh God... you actually heard that whisper!!' =)
One remarkable incident I will never forget is what happened while I was at Boarding School in Kottayam ten years ago. We were about 110 boarders who studied at the Mar Thoma Seminary Higher Secondary School, Kottayam. My parents and family were mostly in Muscat during that time and I had few (very few) visitors.
So I was one among the 7 NRI guys who rarely had visitors. Visitors meant a lot to us boarders coz we never get an opportunity to go out of the school premises at all! So Visitors meant 'Goodies are here' or in hostel slang we'd say - "Supply" is here! =)
There was this one Sunday, I was sitting alone and thinking " Man, I wish somebody came to visit me" coz the '12 other guys' in my room had somebody visiting them and getting them "supply". Well, Sunday just went by and the thought left my mind.
Next day morning, during the first hour in class, the peon interrupts our class and says - "The Principal is calling for Sam". Phew... I was like "What did I do" ???? (lol!)
(During that time - therez was some police case about some guys coming and burning the superb curtain at our auditorium. So being a hostelite, I thought it should be some questioning session)
Well, I am escorted to the Principal's office... and guess whoz in the Principal's office.
(keeep guessing.... =) ......)
Well.... Here is Dharmistan uncle from Trivandrum sitting with the Principal. And she says that he wanted to see me. So, we walk out. Uncle has a smile on his face as always and .... he is also having a packet in his hands! And there was among other things a Marble Cake! =)
I was jus so taken back... coz this was his first visit and I never expected somebody to come from Trivandrum (130kms away) of all places ... and I just asked him 'how come your visiting??'...
He said something like 'I jus felt seeing you.'
Man... I was such a Haaaapppy Kid!!
I was like.. 'Oh God... you actually heard that whisper!!' =)
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